What Recruits Don’t See: A Coach’s Perspective

The recruiting process is almost always talked about from the dancer’s perspective.

The waiting. The unanswered emails. The uncertainty of not knowing where you stand or whether a coach is still interested.

But after years on the other side of the process, as a Division IA coach and now as the founder of Studio 2 Stadium, there’s something I wish every dancer understood:

Recruiting is hard for coaches, too.

Not because they don’t know what they’re looking for, but because every decision affects someone’s dream.

I’ve sat on the other side of the table, trying to choose between incredible dancers who all brought something different to a team. I’ve had to tell dancers I genuinely cared about that they weren’t getting a spot. I’ve held onto recruits longer than I should have because I hoped they would surprise me, and I’ve watched a dancer walk into a clinic for the first time and completely change what I thought my team needed.

Those are the parts of recruiting dancers rarely get to see.

So before recruiting season ramps up, I want to share what the process can look like from the coach’s side of the table.

There's More Happening Than You Realize

When recruiting season begins, coaches aren't just recruiting. They're coaching their current team, planning clinics, attending games, adjusting choreography, traveling to combines, reviewing videos, coordinating auditions, managing schedules, answering hundreds of emails, and getting ready for another year with the dancers already on their roster.

Many college dance coaches are also working full-time jobs outside of coaching. Coaching often happens before work, after work, on weekends, and while juggling countless other responsibilities.

That doesn't mean your email isn't important or that your video wasn't watched. It simply means coaches are balancing a tremendous amount while trying to give every recruit the thoughtful consideration they deserve.

Sometimes There Isn't a Wrong Choice

One of the biggest misconceptions about recruiting is that coaches are simply choosing the "best" dancer. In reality, they're building a team.

Imagine having one roster spot left and three dancers who could fill it. One has exceptional technique. One is an incredible performer. One is a natural leader who elevates everyone around her. None of them are the wrong choice, each would make the team stronger in a different way.

The hardest recruiting decisions were rarely about talent. They were about fit.

As coaches, we weren't asking, Who's the best dancer? We were asking, Who completes this team?

Those decisions take hours, not minutes. Coaches are weighing leadership, versatility, team chemistry, future roster needs, and how every piece fits into the bigger picture. Sometimes the hardest decisions aren't between a great dancer and an average dancer, they're between three incredible dancers who all deserve the opportunity.

The Conversations That Stay With You

People often assume the hardest part of coaching is deciding who makes the team.

It wasn't.

The hardest part was letting go of dancers I genuinely cared about.

While coaching at the college level, I also taught at local studios, so many of the dancers in my recruiting process were girls I'd known for years. I watched them grow up, celebrated their accomplishments, and built relationships with them long before they ever became recruits.

Then recruiting season would come, and sometimes I had to tell a dancer I deeply cared about that they weren’t going to receive a spot on my team. I knew how much they wanted it, how hard they had worked, and I hated knowing I was the one delivering that disappointment.

What made it even harder was watching our relationship change afterward. I never wanted one recruiting decision to outweigh years of trust we'd built together, but sometimes it did. That part always stayed with me.

Early in my coaching career, I also made the mistake of holding onto recruits for too long. Part of me hoped they would surprise me, continue to grow, or prove they were the right fit.

Eventually, I realized that waiting wasn't always the kindest thing I could do.

The longer I delayed a decision, the longer that dancer stayed in limbo.

Giving a dancer clarity, even when it wasn't the answer they wanted, gave them something incredibly valuable: time. Time to process, time to grieve, and time to pursue another opportunity that might ultimately be an even better fit.

Sometimes the kindest decision is also the hardest one to make.

Recruiting Can Change Overnight

This is one of the hardest realities of recruiting.

A dancer can attend every clinic, build a genuine relationship with the coaching staff, and do everything right. Then another dancer walks into a clinic for the very first time and turns out to be exactly what the program didn't know it was missing.

Maybe it's their versatility, performance quality, leadership or maybe they are simply the final piece that completes the recruiting class.

As coaches, we never wanted dancers to feel like we were stringing them along. Sometimes we simply weren't finished evaluating. Sometimes another clinic changed everything. Sometimes one conversation with the coaching staff completely shifted what we realized we needed.

That doesn't erase everything the first dancer did. It doesn't mean the coach was leading anyone on or that one dancer deserved it more than the other. It means teams evolve, needs shift, and sometimes the picture changes overnight.

Before Recruiting Season Begins...

As you head into the months ahead, remember there are real people on both sides of this process.

Coaches know how much you've invested in this dream and how much courage it takes to put yourself out there. They also know that every "yes" usually means delivering a heartbreaking "not this time" to another dancer who was just as deserving.

If I could go back and talk to every dancer I ever recruited, or every dancer I had to let go, I would tell them this:

My decision was never a reflection of your worth as a dancer or as a person.

It was my responsibility to build the best team I could with the opportunities, limitations, and needs of my program at that moment in time.

Looking back, many of the dancers I didn't recruit went on to have incredible college careers. Some became captains. Some found programs that were an even better fit than mine ever would have been.

Watching them succeed reminded me that there is rarely just one right path.

Years later, I don't remember every routine or every score, but I do remember many of the conversations where I had to tell a dancer she wasn't getting the answer she hoped for. Those moments stayed with me because I cared.

So as recruiting season begins to take shape, keep showing up. Keep improving. Keep believing in yourself.

One "no" doesn't erase years of hard work. The right coach isn't looking for the perfect dancer, they're looking for the right fit. And when you find that fit, you'll understand why every step of the journey, even the hard ones, led you exactly where you were meant to be.